


CAP23 vs TPH17

by Wonderments



Category: Women's Soccer RPF
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-30
Updated: 2018-01-05
Packaged: 2019-02-24 02:26:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 10,156
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13203789
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wonderments/pseuds/Wonderments
Summary: A story about the first time the number 23 means something of significance to Tobin Heath.Spoiler alert: It's not good.





	1. Number 23

**Author's Note:**

> Hi guys! I love this sport and I love writing, so I thought, why not combine those two. However, I'm not American and I don't know each and every detail of the leagues or the players, but I promise to try my best. Although, some things will be purposefully incorrect and I guess you'll just have to read through it to get to know the players the way they are in this story. Feel free to tell me if there's something I should know or something you want to know (preferably about the story, but hey, I'm up to talk about anything). I appreciate any comment, both good and bad and also every single one of you for taking the time to read it. Hope you have a great day with lots of smiles!

2014 is the year Tobin Heath is personally introduced to the firework that is Christen Press. They're in the middle of the second half between Portland Thorns and the Chicago Red Stars. The weather is sort of chilly for a summer afternoon, but the temperature out on the field among the players is nothing less of blazing hot, spurring on rough tackles that walk the fine line between effective and downright reckless.

The Portland Thorns' players wear a darker red than the devil and are chasing a much needed equalizer with every fiber of their bodies working overload. Tobin eyes an opportunity for a quick sprint as she crosses the center line with the ball, basically undisturbed, which gives her time to search the field after available teammates.

Within a few seconds, Allie's long blonde ponytail catches her eye on the right side of the field. She's a little further up than Tobin and with an open lane without any defenders remotely close to her. As usual, Tobin doesn't have to think too much as her instincts immediately kick into action, her body leaning slightly backwards at the same time as her her leg swings back to prepare for the long pass.

Barely a single breath after the tip of Tobin's brand new orange Nike cleat makes contact with the ball, she gets a hard tackle from behind, both of her feet swept away from under her. Completely taken off guard, she doesn't have time to brace herself and she ends up crashing against the field, landing flat out on her stomach. Her chin is firmly planted against the green beneath her and she hisses, closing her eyes while a painful groan leaves her mouth.

Everything below her shins aches like a bitch.

An exasperated puff of air is all she manages without breaking out in tears, before she pushes herself up on her knees. It quickly becomes apparent that her right ankle is hurting far more than after a regular tackle.

All around her she hears the booming sound of whistling from the forever supportive Portland Thorns' fans, calling out for a rough foul rather intensely. The fans' endorsement prompts Tobin to open her brown eyes and bite her lip to hold in another whimper. Instead she takes in the sight of the people coloring most of Providence Park stadium in an inspiring red, filling with immense pride and gratitude.

Despite being in pain, Tobin throws a reassuring smile up at the supporters who start to wildly applaud her the second she wills herself back on her feet. It's an unique feeling that she can't seem to get anywhere else, one that emerges from the thrill of the game, but also from the unwavering support from her teammates and the fans.

However, if Tobin thought the tackle was bad, it's nothing compared to the uncontrolled sparkles flying everywhere when the referee pulls up the infamous red card from his outer pocket and raises it to the dark-haired girl spotting the number 23 on her back. If there's one feeling Tobin wish she would never have to feel again, it's the one that spreads throughout her body when the exploding firework (better known as Christen Press) passes her a glare with such fury that Tobin fears it might actually burn through her toned skin.

Christen Press is beautiful, dangerous and literally fuming. Tobin can see every muscle in the girl's body tense up, her cheekbones prominent and her cheeks flushed in a near burgundy color. A string of expletives is the last thing to leave the aggravated girl's mouth as she stomps off the field, immediately disappearing into the wardrobe without a single word to spare to her coaches or teammates.

Tobin only manages to scoff at it all, mildly confused at the girl's silly behaviour. It sure as hell wasn't  _her_  that made such a reckless tackle.

"You doing okay there, Tobs?" Allie asks breathily as she strides over to Tobin's side after having argued with the referee on her behalf.

The blonde is in obvious distress, her eyebrows knit together in worry and her breathing is heavy from protesting as much as from the actual running. Tobin's grateful for Allie's supportive hand that finds its way to her back, almost laughing a little as her friend suddenly lets her irritation out, an angry wrinkle forming on her forehead. "A red card is the least of what that girl deserves. That was a fucking amateur tackle. I don't know what the hell she was thinking, sliding in like that from behind."

Tobin shrugs her shoulders, not too interested in dwelling too much on the previous tackle. Right now she just wants to get back in the game, preferably with a goal, preferably alive (the latter honestly doesn't feel as important right now). "It's nothing to worry about. Simply gonna bruise tomorrow, but what won't nowadays." Tobin tries to lighten the mood with a little joke.

Allie still sends her a worried glance, scanning down her body to her ankles that were both pretty roughly attacked. As usual, Tobin only grimaces back at as she walks over to the penalty area, preparing for the free-kick to be taken and hoping that Allie's professionalism will overshadow the girl's protective instincts.

The game continues on and against the white jerseys' now ten players and without their banned two-goal scorer, the Portland Thorns slowly but surely regains control of the match. About ten minutes before end time, Tobin, as many times before, runs down the left side of the field near the corner flag, catching a vague glimpse of her team's forward Jess McDonald.

Her long-time teammate is running towards the far post and by the time Tobin has dribbled past the Red Stars' right back, she watches the ball leave her foot and soar through the air. The next thing that happens is the result of a lot of precision and a little bit of luck. The ball makes firm contact with Jess' forehead and soon the net behind the goal keeper.

That's the moment when Tobin isn't sure if it's her own scream she hears or the one from every single person in the stadium. Tobin grins happily anyways, immediately catching a jumping Jess in her arms, enjoying the embrace and throwing both of her hands up in the air in celebration afterwards.

Nothing else matters in that second. As long as they step up their defense and keep a tie, they're going to the play-offs finale and Tobin couldn't feel better about it in that moment. Not even getting subbed out before the last five minutes, can mess with her good mood after that, and Tobin thinks it will last all through the season.

Or so she thought, but then the game ends and by the time the adrenaline leaves her system, it's like she finally allows herself to feel how her right ankle throbs alarmingly. She quickly receives an ice-pack and curses inwardly, already deciding to not to let it stop her from playing the next couple of games.

What really, really, really puts a damper on her lasting good mood is when she receives a tackle within the first minute of their next game. This tackle isn't like the other, it's weak, almost halfhearted it seems, but just to Tobin's luck, it scratches against the one spot that has her crashing to the ground, shouting out in pain.

And as simple as that, the rest of Tobin's soccer season evaporates into thin air and a foreign emotion starts to play out in her chest -  _bitterness_.

A swallowing, all-consuming ball of bitterness for the Chicago Red Stars' number 23.

•••

Tobin can't believe she is late to practice, or she can... what she can't believe is how she's late  _again._  It's not her first time being at an USWNT soccer camp, but it's the first one in 2016 and she really doesn't want to give the other girls any reason to call her a newbie or make fun of her for the rest of their stay.

When she reaches the field, she's sweaty and kind of out of breath, but she still offers a cheeky smile to the assistant coach and staff who all just smile at her from the sideline. The rest of the girls have already gathered in a circle at the center and Tobin doesn't hesitate to sprint up to her teammates. This year is a fair mix of strangers and familiar faces, but mostly people she has encountered at one point or another. Many of the expressions she notices range from excited to nervous as hell, but Tobin doesn't have the time to scrutinize every face closely.

Some of them look up to give her a discreet smile as a welcome gesture when she finally approaches them, while others keep their eyes diligently locked on their coach, Jill Ellis. Tobin smiles back and attempts to sneakily slide into line without drawing too much attention to herself, falling into place and instantly listening to Jill's instructions and her 'welcome-to-the-game' and 'field-of-opportunities' speeches.

However, seeing as there is nearly four years since her debut on the national team, there are naturally (and unfortunately) more than one person who enjoys to make Tobin's late arrival  _very_  obvious.

One of them is Kelley O'Hara, who is standing right next to her and not surprisingly, the freckled brown-eyed girl can't help but make a teasing comment. "Can't believe you look like shit when you got about an hour more than the rest of us." She says as she nudges Tobin's side teasingly, her lips forming a lopsided smile.

Tobin immediately glares at her close friend, but blushes slightly when a few heads turn her way at Kelley's supposed whisper. "Shut up. It turns out my alarm was put on some silence mode. I didn't even know that was an option." Tobin mumbles out her poor excuse, trying to keep her voice low and out of their coach's hearing reach.

"Such a rookie mistake, Tobs." Alex Morgan decides to jump into the conversation from Tobin's other side. The brunette grins in satisfaction at her friend's dispense, the two of them having shared lots of years as teammates at several clubs together. "But maybe that's to your advantage. I heard the WPS has been looking for the next rookie of the year. You should nominate yourself."

"Uh- no, not likely to happen, Morgan. Tobin's way too old for that award. Look at her, she's 25 and for sure getting wrinkles around her eyes." Kelley points out quickly and touches at Tobin's face. The defender shares a small laugh with Alex when Tobin swats at her hand.

After years of knowing these girls, Tobin knows talking back will only fire them up more. She can only roll her eyes at her two friends as they continue to throw comments back and forth lightly. She knows it's all in good spirit and it definitely helps loosen up the stress she's felt since she woke up and discovered she would be late. On top of that, Alex and Kelley's easy mood seems to free the players around of some of the lingering tension that's always present the first day of camp.

Eventually Jill clears her throat, understandably not thinking Alex and Kelley's verbal sparring to be as funny as the others, "There's always an immense amount of pleasure to have you three ladies on the team, O'Hara, Heath, Morgan. Welcome back this year." Jill greets them and raises an expectant eyebrow in the direction of the three players, prompting the laughter to ebb out.

"Sorry coach." Alex mumbles out apologetically, blushing slightly, to which Kelley can't help herself and throws out a 'kiss ass' masked behind a fake cough.

Naturally it doesn't sit well with Alex who sends her an unimpressed scowl in return, but she apparently refuses to take any more of Kelley's bait. Instead the tall brunette swings her head and tosses her long, perfectly straightened ponytail over her shoulder. She turns to their coach and listens intently on the new information that is being presented.

Kelley however flashes Tobin a victorious grin while Tobin settles on shaking her head, amused and kind of endeared at her friend. For a brief second she lets herself soak in the moment of being back on the field with all these amazing people.

"About time we get to warm ups or what do you say, ladies. I promise it won't be this much information before every practice." Jill reveals with a reassuring smile and Tobin watches as many of the new players seem to calm a little down, but a lot of them are still kind of motionless, rocking back and forth on their feet.

Tobin sympathizes with them, remembering how terrified she had been at her first practice. In her mind she had doubted her own abilities and boasted up everybody else's. Actually it had taken her a few practices to get it right, to trust her own abilities as much as she should.

"Any questions before we start?" The older woman checks with the group, swiping a quick glance between the faces and wanting to make sure they all feel comfortable. "Really O'Hara? None at all?" Jill asks again, feigning surprise which makes everybody laugh as Kelley reveals a broad, confident smile.

"Just one, please." Kelley smirks happily, "Do we get chocolate milk during breaks or after breaks? I have to know exactly when, you know, for motivational reasons..."

Another round of laughter breaks out in their group and Tobin can see that even Jill struggles to contain herself as she clasps her hands together. "Okay Kelley, I think not spending time with me on the bench should be motivation enough for you. Come on girls, I want groups of six, two inside a square and four on the outside. Take it slow and try get a feel of the ball. Most of you know this drill, but make sure everyone gets started." Jill calls out the instructions, emphasizing her last sentence before she walks over to join the other staff on the sideline.

The larger group smoothly scatter into smaller ones as instructed, loud chattering immediately erupting among the players as new and old players get to know each other or catch up. Tobin loves this, the sport, the community that consists of players from all around the world from various of clubs. It's like her second family and she revels in the familiar feeling of being back at camp again.

"But seriously, give me something. Who are the rookies this year?" Tobin asks interestedly and thereby ends the small talk going around. She swoops down to pick up four orange cones, before she follows behind Alex, Lauren Holiday and Amy Rodriguez. She is walking next to Kelley and with Carli Lloyd behind them. The latter and current captain had taken upon herself the mission to retrieve a ball from one of the nets.

"You mean besides baby horse over here?" Kelley remarks and shoots a sly, knowing look at Alex's back, the pretty forward swinging around on her heel, lifting her middle finger to flip Kelley off without hesitation.

"Oh, why don't you bite me Kelley. I've been here for three years. Just because the two of you got one more year on this team doesn't mean you get to call me a baby!" Alex wildly protests but keeps a friendly tone, pointing an accusing finger at both Kelley and Tobin.

Tobin shortly holds her hands up innocently, "I didn't say a word!"

"We all know you were thinking it, Tobs." Amy rolls her eyes at Tobin, smiling widely as she slows down and throws an arm around her, pulling her into a loving side hug. "Good to see you back on your feet again, literally."

"You too." Tobin smiles appreciatively.

"Alex has a point though, Kells. You're about as much of a baby as she is." Carli Lloyd agrees with Alex as she jogs past them with the ball between her feet, managing to ruffle Kelley's hair in the process.

"Hey! Stop that." Kelley calls her out, pouting as she readjusts her ponytail, tightening it and looking to Alex with an even clever smirk after. "I want you to know that I do hear you though, Morgan. From here on and out, I officially release you from the nickname baby horse."

"Thank y-" Alex begins but is cut off immediately.

"You're simply  _horse_."

Alex's brown eyes widen at the statement as much as her friend's mischievous gaze. She growls out in irritation as she picks up the ball from Carli before the captain can protest. As expected, the ball is meant for Kelley and Alex forcefully throws it in her direction. The only thing saving Kelley's head from getting smacked down is her quick reflexes. A shocked gasp falls from her lips before she bursts out in another laugh at Alex's disappointed face. She nearly has to hold her stomach with how much she is cracking up, her round cheeks alternating into a deeper shade of red.

"Oh my God, you should see your face." Kelley snickers proudly at her own antics, but doesn't have too much time to enjoy the moment when she sees Alex starting on her way over to her.

The last thing Kelley does is letting out a yelp as she starts sprinting in the opposite direction. Tobin chuckles as she moves out of the way when Alex follows after, ending up chasing a giggling Kelley around the field while Lauren reluctantly goes to retrieve the ball Alex had thrown.

The rest of their group sets up the square and prepares themselves for the drill, updating each other on what's been going on lately. If it were anyone else messing around like her two friends, Tobin is sure Jill or the others would be more mad or impatient. But seeing as Kelley is known for her playful act and Alex is known for being Kelley's number one victim, she knows everybody just lets them do their own thing.

A few minutes later, Carli straightens up and calls out for the two girls rolling around, busy playfully fighting as if their lives depended on it. This time her tone is way more authoritative than her normal speaking voice. "Kelley, Alex, get over here so we can start, you idiots!"

"Yes Captain." They both answer back, giggling to each other again as they pull each other up and dutifully jogs over to their friends.

"It's almost like you guys think we're still at an U-15 practice." Lauren mutters when the two girls appear at their square, immediately taking the two only available spots in the middle.

Unphased, Kelley grins at Lauren. "For me it kinda is. All you guys are here and finally we have Tobin back too. We're all excited about playing together and I have missed this, playing with you guys. So except from that fancy ring on your finger, Mrs Holiday, nothing's really changed in my eyes."

And as simple as that, it all goes quiet for a moment as they let Kelley's words sink in. Meanwhile, Kelley is standing with her hands resting on her hips, beaming proudly. Most of them seem taken back by Kelley's thoughtful words, but Tobin only smiles sweetly. Sometimes it amazes her that none of them seem to have discovered that Kelley isn't simply insufferable teasing and bad jokes. The girl sure got her moments.

"Okay, enough. You're being weird. Let's just start." Lauren mumbles out the order, rolling her eyes in what's supposed to look like annoyance but Tobin notices the uncharacteristic soft smile that now ghosts their friend's lips.

Eventually they get to the warm up, everyone seemingly content with the quietness and to not concentrate on anything else than passing the ball. Although, they don't even make it ten full minutes before somebody speaks up again, breaking the silence.

"Back to the rookies... Who are they again?" Amy questions, bringing up the subject from earlier with a genuine and curious expression.

Tobin's eyes snap up, matching Amy's interest as they look to Carli for answers, all continuing to pass the ball between them. They pass the ball back and forth when the play eventually gets interrupted by Kelley who's been stuck inside the square for a while, excitedly celebrating the small triumph with a fist pump as she switches place with a sullen Alex.

"As of right now I would say there are three rookies on this team. At least since Tobin's last camp. Morgan Brian is definitely one you'll have to keep an eye out for. I have watched her a few times in action and she's tiny, but she can hold her own out on the midfield. She knows what to do with the ball and manages both long passes and short ones really well." Carli starts explaining the most recent addition to their team, the others hanging onto every word in interest.

"I got to talk to her a little before Jill's speech too. Except from Alex over here, I think Morgan Brian has got the most confidence out of all of us. She's a smart one though. About as ready as they come." Lauren adds in between ragged breaths, tilting her stance to lessen the angle for Tobin's pass.

Everyone around gives a small nod in acknowledgement to the information, trying not to get unfocused while listening at the same time. "Julie Ertz is a different kind of player. She is probably the most versatile player I have witnessed in a long time. During the last year I've seen her succeed- no  _excel_  in nearly every position on the field." Lauren commends truthfully, recalling the times she saw the younger girl's impeccable skills.

"I agree. She will be a phenomenal asset to our team. But maybe more importantly, I think Jill has finally found a replacement for Abby." Carli reveals the exciting news and flashes a satisfied grin at the group, a low 'shit' falling from her lips as she completely misses the pass from Amy and has to switch place with a more than pleased Lauren.

"Really? I didn't think Jill ever would." Tobin notes truthfully and makes the others nod in agreement. They all humbly remember how important Abby had been for the team and for them as individual players. Honestly, it's a bit strange for them to imagine anyone ever taking her place, but that's just how it works in this kind of career. People come and go, and you just have to do what it takes to stay. 

"Where is she from?" Alex asks, the mentioning of another forward understandably peaking her interest.

"Don't worry. No way she's got anything on you baby horse." Kelley reassures her and Alex takes it, sending her an appreciative smile in return.

"I honestly don't know, Alex. Word is she used to play in Sweden for a while, but I'm pretty sure she has played for the Chicago Red Stars for a while now." Carli spills even more details, dropping her voice an octave lower in case their new teammates are close. Clearly they're not saying anything bad, but they don't want to give anyone the reason to get the wrong impression either.

"What's her name?" Tobin finally asks as she receives the ball again, taking a moment to get it under control and ultimately  passing it over to Lauren.

"Her name is Christen-"

"Shit, Press!"

Tobin turns around at the name being called from behind her. Her brown eyes go wide when the only thing she has time for is to make out the round form of the soccer ball before it coup her entire vision. Tobin has never been one to shy away from a ball, but when this specific one hits, she sure as shit wishes she had dodged it.

The sheer force of it colliding against her forehead is enough to knock her off balance and causes her to end up flat on her back. Her forehead starts burning from the contact with the ball and she can feel her heart picking up speed from the shock, hammering against her ribcage rhythmically.

"Fuck." Tobin curses under her breath and blinks her eyes, trying to regain focus.

"Oh my, is she all right?"

"I think she's dead."

"Kelley don't say that! Her eyes are totally open, you shithead." Alex frowns at Kelley's decision to make an inappropriate joke.

"Stop hassling her guys. Why don't you back up a bit and give her some room." Lauren's stern voice sounds and she positions herself in front of Tobin, thinking she's the only one with common sense as she bends over to pull Tobin up by her arms. "How do you feel? Dizzy?"

"I'm good." Is all Tobin manages to croak out when she's back on her feet. She is still feeling a bit lightheaded from the collision, but it helps having Lauren's side to lean into for support.

"No offense, Heath, but you really went down like a bowling pin." Kelley chortles out humorlessly but stops when Alex glares at her with less enthusiasm.

"Yeah, I guess I did." Tobin laughs and removes herself from Lauren's side.

"I am so sorry. Ashlyn dared me to hit the goal post, but then I slipped and completely lost control of the ball." A light and sincere voice appears from behind Kelley and Alex, and Tobin instantly looks to it. The color drain from her face and her jaw nearly drops all the way down to the grass when her brown eyes land on the slender, raven-haired girl.

"Of  _fucking_  course it had to be you." Tobin huffs and sees the girl's tanned face falling slightly at her icy tone.

Her behavior is completely out of character and the other girls seem to think so too as they send Tobin and each other all sorts of confused looks, honestly too surprised to say anything. Tobin only ignores them and she also ignores the guilt that creeps into her chest, because seeing the forward once again feels awfully close to getting hit by the ball. The bitterness from two years ago blossoms inside of her as if it never really left. And maybe that's exactly the case.

"Me? What do you mean? Look, I'm sorry, but it was an accident. If it helps at all, I really didn't mean to hurt you." Christen apologizing again, trying not too scoff loudly at the girl's aggressive attitude. She clenches her fists together instead, struggling to keep her calm and not winding up the girl even more, not wanting to cause a big scene in front of all these people.

"Oh, yeah, you're absolutely right. That really helps my face, thanks a lot." Tobin says with her words laced with far more sarcasm than what would be considered fair, and everyone standing nearby winces at their friend's tone.

Without bothering with another word, Tobin begins on her way to the sidelines with long strides. Her head is blurry and filled with heated thoughts as she goes over what had just happened. It's the first time she has ever snapped at well, anybody. The rarity of her actions only adds to the frustration that's already harboring inside of her.

Meanwhile, the other players are left with a lot of confusion as they send Christen a questioning look on their friend's behalf. The green-eyed girl's face displays it's own version of a question mark as she shrugs her shoulders, not sure what else to do. No one can really understand what just occurred, but Alex is the first one who moves into action, running after Tobin. And considering the two girls' close friendship, the rest of the girls wordlessly agree it's probably for the best to let the forward deal with what can only be described as uncharted waters.

When Alex reaches Tobin's side, she hesitates to speak for a second, not really sure what's the right response to her friend's odd outburst. "Are you going to tell me what that was all about?" She eventually questions, side eyeing the brunette's stern face with concern.

"Nothing." Tobin claims unconvincingly, taking a sharp breath as they reach the sidelines and she goes to grab her water bottle.

"Are you sure about that?" Alex asks suspiciously, obviously not believing Tobin for a second after having personally witnessed the not so friendly exchange. "You came off pretty aggressive back there."

Tobin sighs, spraying water into her mouth and wiping her lips with the back of her hand afterwards. "I'm not mad."

"Ok, good, I guess. Maybe you should go tell that to the rookie you just destroyed in front of her new teammates then." Alex mumbles out a little annoyed, but softens within seconds as she tries a more genuine approach. "For real, Tobin. I've never seen you act like that to anyone before. It honestly made me kind of worried."

"If she didn't want to be told off, she shouldn't have lost control of that stupid ball in the first place. It's as simple as that." Tobin excuses herself with a small huff, refusing to feel bad for the girl even when her stomach tells her to do exactly that.

"Alex, Tobin! 'Welcome back' does not mean you're allowed to ditch warm ups and certainly not to stand over here, gossiping like a couple of school girls." Jill calls out to them as she walks closer, her features softening in an instant when she discovers the red bruise decorating Tobin's forehead elegantly.

"What happened to you? I mean, why does your forehead look like the inside of a watermelon?" Jill asks with wide eyes, looking between her two players for answers.

"Your new striker happened." Tobin reveals and groans a little when she reaches up to touch at the sore area.

"Press. She got you good, huh." Jill says and Tobin hates how the coach almost sounds impressed. "Does it still hurt or are you feeling dizzy? Any nauseous at all?"

"I'm good." Is all Tobin answers. Because, except from being infuriated with their new forward for reasons that are anything but logical, she is good.

"Alright. I'll take your word for it. I know I can trust Alex to keep an eye on you, so get back out on the field when you feel like it and show those rookies how it's done." Jill encourages and smiles at the two girls as they simply nod their heads, running back to their group.

Tobin is extremely grateful that nobody brings up the previous incident, even though she knows Alex isn't able to just drop it and will probably drag the truth out of her when they aren't surrounded by other people.

And by the time they start playing teams and against each other, things actually return to before the warm ups. All that bitterness dissolves in her chest and all she can think about is the ball - where to pass it, when to shoot it and being aware of its whereabouts at all time.

For as long as she can remember, it has been a natural habit for Tobin to zone out when she plays soccer, which is probably the main reason to why she loves it so much, but also plays it so well. Soccer has become her second nature, a safe harbor where she doesn't have to plan or concentrate. It's not even about forcing herself to keep her head in the game, because her head is always in the game, sometimes even off the field as well. When she stops to think and just lets her imagination and instincts run freely, that's when Tobin is at her best.

And she'd be damned if she allows the dark-haired striker, the one who's been lingering in the back of her mind and torturing her for the last two years, to disrupt her game.


	2. Down We Go- or Not

Tobin ends up making it through the first day of camp without interacting too much with Christen off the field. Truth be told, she had made the chance of them bumping into each other rather impossible, avoiding the green-eyed girl like she had the worst kind of plagues.

For instance, she had made an effort to sit the furthest away from the girl during team dinner, and at their last post-practice meeting for the night, she'd found herself in the front row instead of one of her preferred back rows. Simply so she wouldn't be stuck staring at the green-eyed girl's obnoxious face for the next hour or so.

Altogether, it is a difficult and demanding task whatsoever. Camp ultimately meant unlimited quality time with the team, which is ironically why Tobin also enjoys them so much.

Granted, some of her closest friends did notice her strange (and maybe even a little childish) behavior, but none of them know how to attack the issue. After learning to know Tobin throughout the years, they all respect the girl enough to give her some time to come around and tell them what's going on when she's ready.

They are all willing to get to know Christen though, not wanting anyone to feel left out either. They welcome her into their group with bright smiles and jokes, which makes it that much harder for them to understand Tobin's apparent dislike to the girl.

From what they've experienced, Christen is practically a saint!

When she wakes up the next day of camp, Tobin dreads the fact that she is bound to encounter the new striker at some point. She rubs at her eyes tiredly, groaning as she realizes that with two practices a day, anyone would be hard to avoid. But she pulls herself out of bed and gets prepared for breakfast, sneaking out of the hotel room early and making sure not to wake Alex in the process.

The elevator doors open and in an instant, Tobin's mind tries to list all her bad actions that could result in the world's worst karma.

Inside the elevator stands Christen, her hair pulled back in a tight and high ponytail and with her back straightened.

Whether Christen is surprised to see Tobin or just surprised because someone else is up this early in the morning, Tobin can't tell, but she looks equally shocked.

Unlike Tobin, who only picked up the first shirt and grey sweats from her suit, the dark-haired girl looks ready for practice in one of their teams' white jerseys, a black Nike training pants covering her slender legs and a pair of running shoes in a bright yellow neon color.

They both seem to try gather themselves as Tobin steps in awkwardly. There's a faint smile that plays tentatively on Christen's lips, but Tobin dismisses it quickly and makes it a mission not to meet the intense green eyes staring into her from her side. Tobin knows there are only about four floors down to the breakfast area, which is a rather short ride.

Nothing she can't handle.

She crosses her arms and presses them against her chest to steady herself, trying not to overthink the situation. Her gaze is kept intently locked at the display of decreasing numbers and she tries her best to ignore the thick tension that's occupying every inch of the small space they find themselves in.

"Okay, that's it."

Tobin doesn't have time to question the girl before the hand moves into a purposeful motion, shortly pressing the emergency button. Again, Tobin finds herself caught off guard by the striker's actions and she has to reach out to her left to support herself as the elevator strains against its cables and comes to an abrupt stop.

Christen seemingly doesn't care as she immediately opens her mouth, "We have to talk. We obviously got off on the wrong foot and I-"

"Why the fuck did you do that?" Tobin hisses in disbelief, interrupting her while her tone returns to the slightly hostile one that as of lately seems to be specifically tailored for the striker. Desperately, she alternates between pushing down on the door open button and the alarm button, holding each of them until she realizes it's pointless. "Don't you know it will take forever to get us out of here?!"

"I- I didn't know that. That can't be true, though, I've watched this happen in movies. Somebody will get us out of here soon." Christen utters the words with seemingly confidence, but the obvious tremble in her voice gives her away.

Tobin takes a few seconds to answer, not wanting to upset the girl further. Christen's tone had turned unexpectedly weak and Tobin visibly spots how the slightly taller girl's whole disposition changes from confident to genuinely scared, the girl nearly shivering next to her.

"Don't just stand there. Help me do something, anything. We have to open these doors and get out of here. There's no way I'm staying here. I can't be staying in here!" Christen says while her breaths repeatedly hitch in her throat and she takes a few steps to stop at Tobin's side. She obviously isn't thinking rationally as she attempts to push the doors open manually.

Without thinking too much about what she's doing, Tobin reaches out to grab both of the panicking girl's wrists to stop her from hurting herself in her comical attempt to get out.

"Hey, Hey! You're okay.  _We_ are fine. Try take deep breaths and calm down a little." Tobin demands and her voice softens automatically.

Christen gives her a vague nod and Tobin loosen her fingers' firm grip around Christen's wrists when the rookie's breathing slowly goes back to a normal pace.

The moment they share, a lasting few seconds of baffled green meeting stable brown is so intimate, so raw, that it makes Tobin uncomfortable. As if she just got burned, she lets go of her wrists entirely in a hurry.

"Uh, um." Tobin clears her throat. "Do you have your phone on you? I left mine back in the room. We should have hit the alarm button enough times for somebody to react, but sending Alex down to the reception probably won't hurt."

"Yeah, good thinking." Christen agrees, digging out her phone from the pocket of her training pants, willingly handing it over to Tobin.

Tobin accepts it and rushes to type in Alex's number, forcing herself not to dwell on the moment between them too much. Fortunately, she doesn't have to as it only takes about five seconds (which feels more like 30 in Tobin's world) for Alex to pick up the call in her grumpy morning voice. "Who's this?"

"Wow, you're such a blessing in the morning. Lucky Servando." Tobin laughs at her friend.

"Tobin? This isn't your number. What's going on?" Alex asks and Tobin can hear her yawning on the other side.

"I'm sorry for waking you, but Christen and I, we're uh- we're kind of stuck in the elevator." Tobin admits and rubs at her neck kind of sheepishly, not sure how else to explain that Christen intentionally trapped them in one without getting too many questions. "Could you maybe go down to the reception and tell them to hurry?"

"Not so fast, did you say Christen? Christen as in Christen Press, the girl you can't look at without your entire face scrunching up? And what do you mean with  _stuck_? Did you mistake the open button with the emergency one again? I told you to get glasses, you useless shit." Alex scolds her but Tobin can hear her move around in the background, probably getting dressed.

"Yeah, Christen and I are stuck, but that's not what is important right now. And hey, you know how much I hate people coming close to my eyes, it's disturbing. Besides, this was an accident. Sort of..." She trails off, blushing slightly as she hopes Christen didn't hear the embarrassing story.

"You got issues, Tobs. But I'm on my way." Alex laughs as she hangs up the phone.

Tobin smiles at her friend and returns the phone to Christen, who's facial features have settled for a detached expression, big green orbs not revealing her emotions at all. "Alex is going."

"Oh, good. That's good... How long will it take?" Christen asks and it irritates Tobin on a whole another level as she suddenly remembers why they're in this situation. And quick like that, the peacefulness that had filled the atmosphere since Tobin miraculously disappear as well.

"It takes as long as it takes." Tobin mutters out, airing her frustration with very little control of her words. "Why would you do such a ridiculous thing in the first place?" She challenges.

"I don't know. I wanted to- but then you were, I mean- ugh!" The green-eyed girl squeaks out, frustrated, apparently struggling to form coherent sentences while clenching her hand around her phone harder.

But then she lowers her shoulders and lets out a sigh, "You seemed really upset at practice and I swear that I didn't mean to make you feel like that. I honestly thought you'd get over it, but then you've kind of been avoiding me so I asked myself, how would I feel if somebody knocked me over with a ball at my first practice, in front of everybody. And I realized I would probably be more pissed than you, so I just wanted to apologize. But then you were ignoring me all yesterday and I figured I had to find a way to talk to you."

Tobin hates how caught off guard she is by the sincerity in the girl's voice and how that voice seems to send the good kind of shivers down her spine. Usually she is eloquent enough to always know what to say, but the girl has a tendency to constantly surprise her, keeping her on the tip of her toes at all times.

A snarky comment or an annoyed look are things she could have prepared for. She could work with that, fire back with no doubt. But a long-ass paragraph and a pair of genuine green eyes drilling into her on the other hand, that is a lot harder to deal with.

So Tobin concentrates on narrowing her own eyes at the brunette, holding her stance with a fake frown as she decides to not let the green orbs get to her. "So you thought trapping me in the elevator would be a good idea?" She mumbles disbelievingly.

"You're talking to me now, aren't you?" Christen laughs dryly and slides down against the back wall of the elevator, completely missing the brief smile that momentarily appears on Tobin's lips from the very valid point she just made. "Just forget it. Obviously it was a stupid idea. I mean, all you have to do is look where it led us. We're trapped in a dirty old elevator and probably running out of oxygen by the time somebody manages to crack those doors open. Please, can we just- just let it go."

With a small sigh, Tobin feels her resistance gradually dissolve at her teammate's wholeheartedness. The striker appears truly remorseful and a little embarrassed, and Tobin doesn't have the heart to bring her further down. Like a switch getting turned, she moves over to the girl, sinking down next to her with a lot less aggression. She leans her forearms on top of her knees, letting the back of her head rest back against the wall. "I'm not avoiding you."

At that, Christen allows a snort to escape and fidgets with her fingers like it's a nervous habit. "Not to be rude, like I don't even know you, but I can tell you're a terrible liar."

Tobin laughs a little, temporarily forgetting to be upset at the girl. "So they say."

"Don't worry. I have met plenty of people with worse qualities in their bags." Christen reassures her with a small smile, playfully knocking against her knee with her own.

"Oh, really? Like what?" Tobin asks and smirks, raising an eyebrow at the girl curiously.

Christen lets out a minor hum, clearly raking her brains after some of her most fitting examples, her eyes eagerly lighting up all of a sudden. "Oh, oh, I once went on a blind date with this guy my friend met at work. I had never seen him before, never talked to him, but even before we'd managed to order he completely lost it at the waiter. And let me remind you, this was a  _first_  date. If I remember correctly, I think he may have drooled at some point." Christen tells the story, her hands simultaneously moving to portray the scenario energetically.

"No way," Tobin utters, wide eyed.

Christen simply nods, but she wears a smile that makes her eyes sparkle and it honestly makes Tobin feel all kinds of emotions. Emotions she definitely isn't ready to explore.

"I'm assuming you left the date?"

"Unfortunately, I didn't at first." Christen admits sheepishly. "I definitely should have. I think I was too mortified to think properly or comprehend that  _that_  really happened. But I ended up using my napkin to hide my face until I made an excuse to leave for the restroom. I remember yelping a passing 'sorry' to the poor waiter as I bolted for the doors. Never looked back. Not once." She explains with a grimace at the memory.

"Strangely, that doesn't surprise me much." Tobin says, falling into an easy laughter, clearly amused at the story.

The small space falls into a serene silence once again, but this one is much more comfortable than all the previous ones combined. As a matter of fact, Tobin can feel her body do something she never thought was possible to do in the girl's present, it's relaxing.

"For the record, I'm really really sorry about hurting you." Christen apologizes again, seriously, but for some unknown reason, the apology doesn't make Tobin feel better.

Actually, it has somewhat of an opposite effect on her, only causing her to feel at edge. Two years ago, those words were all she wanted to hear, but now it amazes her how they make her stomach turn almost guiltily.

"It wasn't really about the shot," Tobin pauses intentionally, biting down on her bottom lip as she debates whether to just let it all out and let the girl out of her misery.

She genuinely doesn't understand why she suddenly has changed her mind or why she freely engages in a conversation with the girl. Maybe it's the funny story or her unexplainable urge to see the girl smiling again, but it prompts her to be honest. "I know it's stupid, but really it's about-"

"Hey guys, are you alive in there?" Alex's voice sounds from somewhere below them, her voice unknowingly interrupting Tobin and causing the girls locked inside the elevator to exchange a brief glance before getting to their feet quickly.

"Yeah, of course we are. Are you going to get us out soon?"

"Give me two seconds," Alex replies and Tobin can hear a buzzing sound right before the elevator starts moving a few inches and the doors ping open.

The relief she feels in that moment goes as quickly as it comes. In the lobby, behind Alex and a receptionist, stands the majority of the team. Tobin can hear them snickering, but if she hadn't, their faces would have given them away regardless. Their cheeks are slightly flushed and an expression of amusement mixed with some confusion covers each and every feature in the room.

"Welcome back to the real world." Alex grins widely, not missing the way Tobin's cheeks are tinting a deep red color at all the attention.

"Now, the two of you owe us a serious explanation."

  * ••



"Okay, so big deal, you're still mad about the tackle. Sounds only fair to me. She put you out of nearly two years of proper soccer and for people like us that's basically a lifetime. I think everyone would understand that you, uhm... feel strongly towards her." Alex rants from the bathroom after Tobin finally tells her the actual reason for her sour mood towards the new striker.

They're back at their hotel room, getting ready for another round of practice.

"That's the thing, it didn't bother me to watch her during her games against Portland. I don't get why it suddenly does. She gets under my skin without even trying, but I've recovered and that's supposed to be what's important, right?" Tobin says irritated, throwing herself back against the bed and sprawling her limbs out in every direction possible.

"You want to know what I think?  _I_ think you're giving this way too much thought. Your reaction could be from the shock of being face to face with her again. Give it time, it'll pass." the younger girl advises, walking out of the bathroom to the nightstand with her hair up in a messy bun while sporting her training gear.

She picks up her phone and instantly, the happy expression on her face falls slightly and her lips press together into a thin line as she goes to type out an answer. The change in her friend doesn't pass Tobin by and it's only natural to assume it's from the text Tobin heard enter her phone while she was in the bathroom.

"Hey, you okay? Who was it from?"

Alex meets her gaze, her warm chocolate eyes abnormally distant. "Oh, it's a message from Servando. Before I left for camp he said he wants to move clubs and I told him we'd talk about it when I get back, but he's been adamant to talk about it in every text since."

"Why does he want to leave Orlando?" Tobin asks surprised, sitting up in the bed and crossing her legs. "Where does he want to go?"

"He wants to go to Montreal Impact. Freaking Montreal." Alex says, slumping down on her bed as another message enters her phone, her full lips parting to let out a groan.

Tobin gives the frustrated girl time to answer, before she brings up the obvious issue. Her voice comes out cautious as she makes sure she threads lightly. "I thought you said the two of you were finally going to settle down in Orlando? You know, the whole package..." she adds, hinting to the topic of marriage she knows the couple has been touching upon lately.

"That's exactly what I said to him. This was supposed to be  _that_ year for us, but he's apparently fine with waiting for another year." She mutters and falls back on the bed, phone dropping on her stomach as she pinches the bridge of her nose.

"And you... are you fine with waiting?"

"Yes. No. Honestly, I'm not sure what I'm supposed to be fine with anymore, but I don't think I have much choice in this. He sounds like he's already made up his mind. Whatever, I'm sure we'll work it out. Like we always do." Alex huffs and Tobin doesn't miss the way her tone doesn't seem remotely happy when she speaks the last sentence.

But this is Alex and it's Servando they're talking about. The couple has been around for too long not to work it out.

Alex pushes herself back into a sitting position and throws one disapproving glance in Tobin's direction. "Ugh, Tobin, seriously. We have to stop procrastinating and you should get dressed. We're already late as it is, and  _you_  definitely don't want to be late again. Jill won't hesitate to kill you." The brunette instructs and effectively puts an end to the previous topic.

"Sorry, I'll hurry. Just hang on, I'll be ready in two seconds." Tobin promises and lets her body tumble off the bed. She reluctantly drags her body over to her suitcase to retrieve her red long-sleeved jersey and black Nike pants.

Pulling on the pants, her thoughts drift to a certain dark-haired girl from the elevator. Anyone laying eyes on the Californian in her US gear must have noticed how the entire attire looks like it was produced simply for her fit. The pants had hugged around Christen's prominent hips tightly, showing off her curves while the jersey had narrowed down her sides with a tender touch, giving away the lean shape of her body.

Up until this moment, Tobin hasn't registered how closely she must have scanned the green-eyed girl, her mind previously fully occupied with the irritation she had carried. The embarrassing truth makes her heat up a bit, only torn away from her thoughts when Alex launches a pillow at her stomach.

"Quit. Stalling. Your two seconds passed minutes ago, Tobs." Alex announces and walks over to their hotel door, pausing to wait on Tobin with her foot tapping impatiently against the floor.

"Yes, right, sorry." Tobin mumbles, turning away from Alex to hide her burning cheeks as she finishes getting dressed.

Finally packing her cleats away, she lifts one of the straps to her bag over her shoulder, walking out of the hotel room with Alex in tow. "Thanks for waiting."

"Like I even have a choice at this point." Alex rolls her eyes, but her tone is teasing. The younger brunette tugs on Tobin's arm and links their arms together as they chat lightly all the way over to the bus that's taking them to a new training field.

They move into the bus and the moment Tobin walks up the last step, she crashes into Alex's tense back and barely saves herself from falling by grabbing onto a seat on each side.

"Why did you-" She starts and is about to chastise her friend when she follows Alex's intense, annoyed look to the row that Tobin and Alex have been residing in since Alex joined the team. "stop."

(Tobin is pretty sure those seats got their own characteristic dents from their butts). Currently in them are an animatedly chatting Kelley and an oblivious Christen, Tobin cringing at the latter. Seems inevitable for her to catch a freaking break from the girl.

Alex on the contrary doesn't seem to shy away from a confrontation, not catching onto Tobin's hesitance. She folds her arms, eyes narrowing in on the two girls and she looks about ten times more intimidating than usual, her jaw clenched warningly.

Tobin knows Alex is on the verge of telling them off, but she is still puzzled about their last interaction and she really doesn't feel like talking to Christen more than she already has today. So she pushes at the brunette's back, leading a wildly protesting Alex into the window seat of a row Tobin knows is usually unoccupied.

"You're not being serious with me right now, Tobin. I don't care if this is her first camp or whatsoever. There is absolutely zero chance I'm letting them sit there. That's  _our_  seats!" Alex whines and luckily, the chatter around the bus is loud enough to conceal it.

"Alex, please. We're going to practice, not a big game." Tobin argues simply and pulls out her set of earplugs from her pocket, not eager to explain the real reason why she doesn't want Alex to pick the fight. "Besides, Kelley knows better than to mess with our ritual on game days."

Alex seems to calm down a little at that, probably seeing the inevitable truth in Tobin's words. Clearly, the brunette isn't satisfied with not getting her way, but she sinks down in her seat and settles on keeping a permanent frown on her lips. "True. If Kelley tries to pull something that reckless she would be a pain in the ass. Even more than she already is by nature."

Tobin chuckles, propping in her earplugs and connecting it with her phone, her tension draining from her body in an instant as she listens to the music filling her ears. It's a short ride, but the day has already been quite eventful.

All she wants to do now is unwind, to free her mind and to not have to think about anything specific.

When somebody pulls her seat backwards despite her evident attempt to disconnect, Tobin knows there's no chance of that happening in the near future. She sighs and turns around in her seat, greeting the person in the space behind her.

"What do you want?" Tobin grumbles out with a hint of defeat lacing her tone.

"Oh, not much. I see you’ve been assigned new seats.” Ali Krieger suggests plainly and leans her arms over the top of Tobin's seat, happily disregarding her grumpiness with amused eyes shifting from Tobin and Alex over to their usual seats.

"Oh, no." Tobin eyes grow wider at the unspoken question, "Ali, please don't-" She is in the middle of warning the older defender when Alex, on cue, climbs to her knees and wriggles around in her seat, leaning against the seat and ready to fill in her two scents into the conversation.

"Fi- _na_ -lly! Thank you for noticing, Ali. I'm glad somebody cares. This one seems to think it's more of a trivial matter." Alex chimes in a little loudly, pointing at Tobin accusingly and pretty satisfied that someone other than her finally gets to their senses. "I can't believe you're willing to let them taint our tradition like that. It's like you want to jinx us." She directs the last sentence incredulously at Tobin.

Tobin rolls her eyes and tosses her head back, knowing she is now obligated to engage in the matter. "Ugh, changing seats once isn't like breaking a mirror, Alex. We're not gonna be cursed for the next seven years."

"Like you can know," Alex whines out her protest, pouting like a child who doesn't get their will, before she lets out a small huff, "Why risk it is all I'm saying."

"You’re being dramatic, Alex. It's just a seat, right Ali?" Tobin assures and instantly looks to the team's right back for support. She tries not to squirm in her seat at her own scant excuse. She is  _so_  ready to move on from the subject by now.

Ali shakes her head, raising her hands up dismissively. "I actually agree with Alex on this," her friend rejects instead, to which Alex grins wider while Tobin sticks her tongue out at the both of them. "Come on, Tobin. To you guys it's never been  _just a seat._  Normally you'd be defending your seat with Alex like a lunatic, but all of a sudden you don’t care where you sit?”

”Is it because of Christen?” Alex deadpans, having connected the dots at last.

"No, it’s not about Christen. And I can't believe you guys are giving me shit for trying to be nice." Tobin moans and buries her face into her hands, deflecting the topic to her best ability. Quickly understanding that her friends aren't going to let it go. "Why am I the only one who don't want to abuse the rookies this year?"

"Ha, that's rich coming from you, Heath. I believe every single person on the field witnessed you jump down Christen's throat yesterday. Your rookies included." Ashlyn Harris shoots into the conversation from her seat next to Ali, pulling off her headset and letting them hang loosely around her neck, grinning openly. "But please, go on Tobs, answer Alex's question. We're all dying to know what happened during you and Christen's little elevator trip."

"Keep it down! She's not deaf, you know." Tobin scoffs at them, lowering her voice and throwing a brief glance over at the mentioned girl who's chatting animatedly with Kelley. "It wasn’t a trip, more like an accident. The elevator stopped and then we were stuck waiting for somebody to get us out. End of story."

"That's it?" Ali asks suspiciously.

"Yes.” Tobin snaps a little too quickly and a little too harshly.

"That’s weird," Ashlyn notes calmly, but the clear challenge in her sentence is poorly camouflaged, becoming more obvious with her raise of her perfectly-plucked eyebrows. “Because a little birdy told me Christen pressed the emergency button, and not by accident.” She grins victoriously, watching the next scene play out with a laugh.

Tobin immediately narrows her eyes over at Alex, visibly irritated at the girl for sharing the story and slapping her arm, earning a roar of laughter from the row behind them. Alex pouts and rubs at her arm while Tobin slumps down in her seat, totally over this whole conversation as she puts her earplugs back in.

The three teammates engage in a pretty enthusiastic debate until Alex regretfully sinks back into her seat after a while. A sheepish smile planted on her face and her forehead scrunching up guiltily. She pokes into Tobin’s side, causing Tobin to look at her with an even more annoyed expression.

“Ok, I'll admit that was totally my bad.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story is sort of a slow-burn. Ok, that was a lie, it's totally a slow-burn. But thanks to those of you who left kudos and comments, that's so incredibly nice of you. I hope you all have a good day with lots of smiles. By the way, curious to know what you guys think will happen? It's so cool to read your thoughts.


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